Sunday, 18 September 2011

Mend my broken heart...

I fell in and out of love so many times. Every time I had a serious relationship, I always thought "this is the one" until few months or years after that we started arguing, feeling bored with each other, finding faults, getting irritated of small tiny unimportant things or avoiding each other.

No matter how many times my heart was broken, how many gallons of tears shed, how many painful memories made and how many tequila I swallowed to reduce the pain, I could never reduce the pain of broken heart. People say "practice makes it better" but I think it's not true for broken heart.

Although the experiences didn't reduce the pain of broken heart, they have taught me a lot of things:
1. I learnt that the first few months of the relationship is the best time. I would smile just thinking about him. I could really be super slim coz I didn't need to eat... Seriously, love alone could make me full... I skipped my meals just to hear his voice or just to be with him. I didn't feel hungry at all.... A very weird thing for me who eat even when I don't feel hungry.

2. No matter how the boyfriend looked, the first few months he could easily beat Brad Pitt or George Clooney. At that time, I could find a lot of things that made him beautiful and handsome. I really learnt that "beauty is at the eye of the beholder" is really true.

3. I think "Nothing's gonna change my love for you" is totally bullsxxx!! and overused. If I fall in love with another guy, will he still love me? Of course not...!! If I hate his mother and always break her heart, will he still love me? Of course not...! If he said he would, then I would not want to have him as my husband anyway...

4. Opposite attract is amusing in the beginning but after awhile it's more fun to have someone who enjoys the same thing like I do, even the simplest thing like eating spicy food. I love spicy food but there were times that I had to settle ordering non-spicy food all the time for the sake of accommodating my ex. At the end I used it as a weapon when we argued by saying that I sacrificed for him... Which now I find it very immature and selfish.

5. No matter how many times I told my self I didn't want to fall in love again so I wouldn't get hurt, I still did... Falling in love is not something that I can plan... It just happens.

6. I believe that if it's meant to be then no matter what happens, it will happen.

7. I strongly believe that I have to use my heart AND my brain in any relationship. Love alone can blind a person for awhile but once the lust and passion simmer, the relationship may not be that beautiful anymore.

8. Bad breath and body odor combined is the ultimate #1 turn off factor. No matter how handsome, how rich or how romantic a guy is, if I could smell a mixture of durian, belachan and blue cheese oozing from his pores, I would just run as fast as I could. Because of this I learnt that look and money are not that important....!!!

Actually there are more things I learnt from failed relationships but the point I am trying to make is, no matter how bad the broken heart is, after awhile it will heal and we can learn something from it.

It's better to have loved and hurt than to never have loved at all... What do you think?

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